Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Edgar Sawtelle

So as we were eating our fancy Chipotle dinner on New Years Eve I looked up and declared.

"I am going to finish Edgar Sawtelle tonight!"

Him: ? *blank stare*

About 6 hours left on New Years Eve 2009 I decided that my 2009 resolution was to finish a book.  I had already spent 3 days prior to New Years Eve reading The Story of Edgar Sawtelle.  I used up nap times and time in between cooking and cleaning to get through the book, but up until that point I didn't care when I finished or if I did.

It was my only attempt to feel like I did something in the year of our Lord 2009.  I had about 200 pages left, but I had to do it.  My pride was at stake.  Little Baby goes to bed and I start reading.

What a way to spend New Years Eve, you know?  People are out there in the world partying it up and I come up with some lame idea to accomplish something in 2009, six hours before 2010...and of all things read a book that is going as slow as Christmas.  My only hope was that Oprah told me to read it and I do WHATEVER Oprah tells me to do.  Therefore, the book could only end well since it had Oprah's stamp of approval.  Just because my little brain was thinking that I should stop reading doesn't mean I should.

So, a few minutes until midnight, on the brink of 2010 and a new decade-
I walk to the desk where the Old Man is sitting and throw that stupid book down on desk and curse Oprah for telling me to do this.

Oh yes, I finished the book, but with what consequences Oprah?  Wasting away the last 4 days of my LIFE.  Especially wasting New Years Eve 2009.  I had a least a dozen (or not) better things to do.  What if I would have died the next day Oprah?  Would I have wanted to end the last decade with this book?  Heck no!


Then, the next morning I woke and apologized to Oprah for my wrongdoings, since it was my 2010 resolution to be nice and follow Oprah.  Please Oprah tell me what to do next.  I can't walk without you.


  1. Isn't it funny that if you put the phrase, "Oprah said" in front of most any statement it becomes a little more believeable?? I am kinda over her (I know, GASP!) but I used to Tivo her everyday, but now I just end up deleting them all. Maybe in 2010 you could be a Degenerate or Ellener (Ellen follower). I don't's just an idea...

  2. That's funny. You should join the book club that I am in. I'm not sure I can keep up with it, and they meet on Sunday afternoons, not every Sunday. Anyway I think the next place is in Fort Worth in February. I don't know everyone but one of my friends started it. The current book is Shanghai Girls by Lisa See

  3. Haha! That's hilarious!!!!
    (and for the record, I stayed home, alone, on New Year's Eve.
    I am the lamest!!!